– Another Transformative Coaching Conversation…
The Inside-Out Understanding can be unsettling. It can see you questioning everything, all your beliefs, even the meaning of life (or the purpose of you). What follows, then, is my ‘meaning of life’ answer to a coaching client…
[Last updated: July, 2016 – post summary]
Introduction: The Meaning of Life – It Ain’t “42”, But It Might As Well Be…
I’d like to share with you a ‘meaning of life’ question I got from a transformative coaching client recently, and the answer I gave her.
Y’see, all this Inside-Out understanding – this looking in the direction that the three principles point to – can be a mite unsettling as far as your fixed view of the world (and yourself) goes. As my client, Talulah*, has been finding out…
“What is the Point of Talulah?”
That’s what my client asked me, near the end of one of our sessions on Skype. “What is the point of Talulah?”.
And I liked this question, like it a lot, so I decided to not answer it in the moment – perhaps finding some trite platitude, or two, that might satisfy. Instead, I decided to email her an answer when it came to me (sans trite, hopefully) that felt like a true answer.
And that’s what I did. (I think) And the email is produced verbatim, below…
My WHAT IS THE POINT OF TALULAH* Email
Well, I just saw the scribbled words, “What is the point of Talulah?” on a piece of paper, and it reminded me that I have yet to send you an email answering that question.
I’m sure you’ve probably forgotten I said I’d send this email, but – hah! – now I have not, now I have written said email (below), and just need to proof it, before I click send.
Ooh, how exciting. Now I know how Douglas Adams must’ve felt when he came up with his meaning of life, the universe and everything [ but no idea what a fish has got to do with a bicycle]…
What is the point of Talulah?
Hmm, well my mother always used to say always answer a question with a question. Well, she should’ve if she didn’t. Anyway, I’m going to do just that…
Which Talulah are we talking about, exactly?
- Are we talking about the Talulah who worries, tries to control, and is anxious about the future (aka the unknown – that which cannot be known)?
- Are we talking about the Talulah who remembers dark moments of the past, and takes them seriously just in case they might happen again exactly as before?
- Are we talking about the Talulah who believes the world is against her, always wanting to take advantage and put upon her, and ask (keep asking) for more and more and more of her?
Are we talking about *that* Talulah?
What is the point of her?
Hmm, I don’t think there is a point to *that* Talulah, to be honest. Oh maybe there is a point. Maybe the point of that Talulah is to provide a prickly reminder to her that this is not who she is, that there is Another Talulah, a *Real* Talulah, she can experience life through…
What is the point of *Real* Talulah?
- Are we talking about the *Real* Talulah who manages to get things done, usually with ease, one thing at a time – calmly, firmly, assuredly?
- Are we talking about the *Real Talulah who knows what true, deep, everlasting love feels like, who deep down knows she is, and always has been, okay?
- Are we talking about the *Real* Talulah who connects with others so easily, laughs and mucks about with them, and gets people to forget their woes (their ailments), if just for a moment?
Are we talking about her?
Hmm, strangely, there is also no point to *real* Talulah either – except to enjoy each moment, each experience, each connection, as it comes, with some kind of wonder and awe and amusement.
But, oddly, *Real* Talulah never seems to want to know the point of *Real* Talulah – she’s too busy enjoying her moment!
Does any of that make sense, Lula?
PS And I sent this email to *that* Talulah and to *Real* Talulah too, because it’s relevant to both of ’em!! 😉
(*) Note: My client’s name is not Talulah, obviously – I’ve used that name for privacy’s sake, and because it scanned nicely in this ‘meaning of life’ post!
So What IS The Point, Anyway?
As I researched this piece, to find the best keywords to use – and that would be “meaning of life”, by the way, if you hadn’t already guessed – Google, my research engine of choice, provided me with some more questions
- What is the point of anything?
- What is the point of living?
- What is the point of life?
Whilst the following expressions came to me, via the wisdom of keyword research tool, Wordtracker: how to change, why so serious and even how to meditate
Funny, isn’t it, how the meaning of life really does boil down to the meaning of my life which really reduces to the meaning of me.
Well, as shared on another Inside-Out conversation (somewhere!), Bill Hicks had it right all the way back in the 1980s, he did, when he finished his stand-up comedy set with these wise words…
What is the point?…